10 Things To Keep Private To Be A Woman of Mystery

By DeAndrea Douglas
10 things to keep private to be a woman of mystery

Have you ever wondered why some women are magnetic? It is like they have an alluring kind of energy that pulls you in closer because they have an essence that you can’t quite put your finger on. These kinds of women have perfected the art of mystery. These are 10 things to keep private if you want to be mysterious.

You will know that you need to tighten up if you feel that everyone knows everything about you. You are predictable. Your relationships seem stale and boring. You are full of exactly no surprises. If you have been used to wearing your heart and your thoughts on your sleeve you can turn things around to be more alluring and magnetic.

The Art of Keeping Things to Yourself

Keeping your privacy is key if you want to be alluring. People are fascinated by mysterious women and find them attractive because they want to know more about them. You become magnetic when you don’t reveal everything about yourself too quickly.

how to keep your life private

How To Keep Your Life Private: What NOT To Mention

Mistakes & Insecurities

You should learn from your mistakes and regrets but do not dwell on them. If you are speaking openly about your current regrets and insecurities people could take advantage of that. You don’t want to give people ammunition to use against you. Mystery is a form of protection. The less people know, the less they can hurt you. You want your image to be confident and unbothered. If people know what your Achilles heel is it is difficult for them to see you in the best light. Learn what you need to learn to work through any mistakes you have made, things you regret, and insecurities you have and move on.

Your Finances

It is best to avoid discussing anything related to finances or money. In many places worldwide, it is taboo to talk about money. Just like politics and religion, money is a sensitive topic that should not be openly discussed. Keeping your mystery is the opposite of bragging so do not be boastful about anything, especially money. A mysterious woman doesn’t need to brag her essence speaks for itself. She doesn’t need to say anything. Her energy is powerful. If you brag about money it translates as insecurity. You are trying too hard to show that you fit in because you meet the financial requirements to be in a certain part of society. You may even yearn for people to be jealous of you for your perceived status and that is something a mysterious woman would never care about. She is completely comfortable with who she is.

Intimate Details Of Your Relationship

People should never know what’s going on behind the scenes in your relationship. It is understandable to let your closest friends peek behind the curtain a little bit, but there are some details that should stay solely between you and your partner. You want to make sure that your image and how you are presenting yourself exudes elegance and class. If too many people know you and your partner are in a disagreement or the exact move they did that made you go wild that image is broken. Therefore, it is best to only share unimportant tidbits. The relationship is between you and your partner after all.

Plans and Goals

You don’t want others to knowingly sabotage your goals. They can’t sabotage what they don’t know about. Also, if it is a really important goal you should hold it dearly and be able to easily block out other people’s criticisms and opinions. If they do not know exactly what you are up to and why you are helping yourself by not giving them anything to criticize. You will easily be able to work hard in silence and achieve what you are after because no one will have an opportunity to convince you that your goal isn’t worthwhile.

Also, talking about your goals gives you a dopamine hit that is very similar to feeling like you have already accomplished it. As a result, you may end up not working as tenaciously toward your goal because you got too much of the feeling of already having it. When you keep it to yourself you are more focused on working toward your goal than talking about it.

Gossip & Secrets

Sharing secrets that others have told you in confidence is a very bad look. You don’t want to be seen as untrustworthy. You don’t need to share gossip about others to gain power and status. The more you keep to yourself the more people will see you as powerful. It is not your place to share secrets and gossip about others.

Medical Conditions

Of course, you should mention medical conditions to your doctor, family and your closest friends. However, under no circumstances should you tell the details of your medical condition to people you don’t know very well. You don’t want people to interfere in your private life so you should be cautious about who you trust with that sensitive information.

Family Problems & History

You can talk about your family positively to those who are not in it. Unless they are your therapist, no one needs to know what problems are going on if they are not related to you. You don’t want to downgrade the image of your family to others.


Do not talk about the arguments you have with others. The goal is to have an image of unbotheredness. If you are always talking about some kind of drama that is the opposite of unbothered confidence. Unless they are in disagreement with you, no one needs to know who you are at odds with and for what.

Your Exes

Your partner does not care about your exes. If you are constantly bringing them up and speaking negatively about them you appear stuck on them. It will also make your partner question how you will speak about them should your relationship end. If you share how you were treated by your ex, your new partner now knows that they only need to treat you a little bit better than that to say in your good graces. You are setting yourself up for subpar treatment.


You have worked so hard to have the resources to be able to give back in a meaningful way. That is commendable! However, your philanthropy should remain private. It is gauche to share what causes you give to and how much. It screams insecurity and that you are trying too hard to seem important. Philanthropy should come from your heart and be for a cause you care deeply about. For that reason, it should be done with discretion.

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10 Things To Keep Private To Be A Woman of Mystery | The Lady Loves Living