Keeping a Journal Changed My Life

I’ve been keeping a journal consistently for more than 10 years. I might not write in it every single day, but I do on most days of the week. I can crack open a journal from six years ago and see what I wanted, what I was feeling, what I did, and reflect on it. I often look back on those pages and see that I’m living in an abundance of answered prayers.

I can grab the journal I had before I met my husband and can see how he’s almost exactly what I wanted in a life partner. I had been fine tuning what my ideal spouse to be like for almost two years before we met. I was clear-eyed about my decision to continue to date him because I already knew what my husband would act like, the quality of his character, and what he wanted from life.

I can look back on many journal entries and see how countless things from the peace I feel when I can’t control something to the house we bought are all things I prayed for.

Keeping a journal has made me more self-aware and decisive. I can read entries from years ago and see behavioral and thought patterns that have both served me and led me to places I had no business being.

Having a place to pour your heart out and process your emotions makes you a better person and ultimately, a better communicator. You will have thought about so many things that you do, think, or believe and will have the words to articulate them if you need to. You won’t get triggered and fly off the handle or experience an emotion that you can’t eventually articulate.

You don’t have to keep a journal to find a spouse or any of the things we’re told to want as women. Your journal is yours to pinpoint what you want from life and document it, so when you’re in those pages don’t lie. Get real about what you want, how you’re acting, and what you’re feeling. If anyone reads your journal you’re probably dead so it what you wrote won’t really matter. Or they seriously invaded your privacy and they’re the one in the wrong for that breach of trust.

Periodically taking a few moments to write about what’s on my mind has been monumental. It made me stop just letting life happen around me and start creating what I want my life to be. It shows me what I need to learn or figureout to unlock what’s next. It shows me where to focus and when I need to come up for air. Journaling might not be the serene experience it’s often idealized as, but it’s a necessary part of ensuring I’m living, not just alive.

If you’ve never kept a journal it can feel daunting to get started. A blank page can be scary. It’s full of every possibility and your brain can get stuck on where to start. Though I’ve been journaling for years I still get stuck on where to start sometimes. When that happens I like to fall back on some journaling formats that get the gears moving in my mind.

Affirm, Gratitude, What Can I do to Make Today Great?

This is the easiest format to start with. It’s great to use on days when you don’t feel like your best self or when things aren’t going right. Affirming something about who you are followed by three things you are grateful for and an action plan for what you can do to make your day great are ways to refocus on what you know to be true and what you can control. The chaos of anything else going on in your life can fall by the wayside when you have mentally firm ground to stand on.

This entry will look kind of like this:

I am worth being celebrated.

I am grateful for:

• the health of my family and friends
• a warm house and a soft bed
• food on the table and more in the fridge

What can I do to make today great?

• I’m behind on a few housekeeping tasks. If I knock those out I won’t keep having a nagging thought to get them done.

It’s important that you focus on what you can do to make the day a great one. If you realize you’re saying things that other people could do to make your day great you’re putting control of how your day goes on on other people. You can’t control what anyone else does or doesn’t do. You can only control yourself. Would you rather leave your day to the whims of others or give yourself a say in how it goes?

The Crashout

When I get the urge to type out a scathing opinion about something that just happened or is getting on my nerves I crack open my journal and write it there instead. I vent there instead of on any public feed. I’m sure that’s saved me lots of embarrassment.

My journal is where I crashout so I can get if off my chest. It can say the foulest things on those pages instead of to the person I want to give a piece of my mind. Most of the time I don’t even mean what I write, I’m just mad in that moment. Once it’s out my calmer self can take over. I talk wild and reckless on the page so I can be rational, calm, and get my actual point across when it counts.

More often than not, by writing out my frustration I find that the thing I’m mad about isn’t worth being mad about at all and I quickly move on. I don’t have to stew in the feeling of anger. I can let it go and get back to what I need to do.

Prompts

Sometimes a good journaling prompt is all you need to get your thoughts moving. Somtimes it could be as simple as writing about your favorite color and why you love it. You could also think about what’s the last thing that made you smile and why.

Every so often a good question to ask myself pops in my head. I’ve started sharing them in my Instagram story and saving them in my ‘prompts’ highlight. Its a great place to look if you need some inpsiration.

Perfect Day

This format is a prompt, but it’s my go to. I ask myself that if today were a perfect day in my ideal life, the one I’m praying for, what would I do?

It helps me feel what it would be like if my next biggest prayer was answered. I write about it like it’s actually happening. Like I’m journaling at the start of my perfect day and listing all the things on my schedule. Sometimes I’m journaling like this on a weekend and I get to write about how I get to spend weekends catching up with people instead of cramming all of my errands into two days. Other times I get to write about how I can consistently go to a workout class on the same day every Tuesday morning. I get to write about date night, the trip I’m on, or the perfect addition to a room I’m decorating.

You don’t have to be realistic. For this one delulu is the solulu. Don’t put limits on what can happen in your life or constrain it by time. It’s wild to look back and see that I’m living in so many answered prayers. Some of them are answered in days and others in years, but they became my reality.

Love Letter to Heaven

The love letter to heaven is my favorite format. It’s a journal, a prayer, and a conversation with God all in one. Almost all of these start with Dear God, Thank You for…

I will start with some real things that I am grateful to have right now and make my way into thanking Him for doing the things I’m praying for. I often end up asking Him to make changes in my life and to show me what I need to do allow it to happen. I let the pressure of figuring that out on my own go and surrender the how. Every time I do this I have an answer or an idea in less than 24 hours. It just comes to me and I’m surrendered to any possibility so I see the answer.

Sometimes the answer feels too big and I get right back into my journal and write to Him about how I feel about doing that big thing. I get the reassurance that he wouldn’t have brought it to me if I couldn’t do it, that I am allowed to take up more space, and live the bigger life that I’m asking for. I just have to do big things for it to happen.

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Journaling won’t help you create the lovely life you’re dreaming about if you’re not doing it consistently. You have to make it a habit.

I like to journal in the morning because I can set the tone for my day, but I’ll keep it close by most days so I can add more as it comes to my mind. I don’t tuck my journal away in a drawer. It stays on my desk or on the table so I can always see it and remember to use it.

Any journal will do. I started with cheap notebooks from Walmart, Target, Ross, and Marshalls. It’s more important that the journaling is happening than the book it’s in. You can get something nicer when you know it won’t be a waste of money.

Remember that the journal is for you. It’s a tool for you to get specific about what you want from life. You can’t make it out alive so you might as well do something meaningful with the time you have. You don’t have to change the entire world, but you can at least try to change yours.