Your 20s are a magical time. You are finally experiencing the freedom you dreamed about having once you graduated from university. The world is wide open to you and ready to be shaped to your liking. People might tell you that you’re overly optimistic about what life has in store for you, but with proper planning and execution, you can have the ideal life you want. Here is the advice for young women in their 20s that I wish I had to create my dream life easier and faster.
Advice for Your 20s
Warning! Some of this advice for young women is not politically correct. If I had known about some of these nuggets of wisdom earlier I could have been happier a lot sooner. I would have been more content with my life before I turned 30 if I had known how important these things were. Luckily things turned out great for me, but if I can help one person quantum leap past struggling in their 20s I can die happily 70 years from now.
1. Get Your Education
Go to college and get a degree. It will be a little less stressful to take care of yourself if you have a degree, but that should not be where your education stops. Keep learning and growing so you reach your full potential, but don’t tell any about what you’re learning. I know it sounds nice to share that you have this knowledge, but keep it to yourself. It will save you a lot of heartache and unnecessary shenanigans. This education is for you. Don’t tell anyone. Not your friends, other women, family, literally no one. Just learn it and embody it.
Learn Social Graces
You should learn about social graces so you’ll know how to behave in certain settings. You’ll also be more likable because you’re not a bull in a china shop. Networking opportunities will be easier to come by for you if you know things like how and when to write a thank you note or basic table manners.
Learn Emotional Intelligence
Take this time early in your life to learn about yourself and what triggers you or inspires you to action. Learn about what might trigger others or motivate them to act.
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Learn about Finances and Money
Absorb all of the information you can about saving, investing, stocks, real estate, and personal finance. Start to build your credit and credit score so it will be in a good place when you need to use it. Learn about how money works so you’re not in the dark about how to grow wealth.
Learn about Relationships
Your 20s are the best time to learn about the laws of polarity and what attracts men to women or the masculine to the feminine. Men like their opposite or reciprocal, not the same thing. Learn how to be the reciprocal of what your ideal partner embodies.
Learn about Nutrition
It is easy to feel like a baddie in your 20s because youth and hormones are on your side. If you take the time to learn about what foods will support you in the long run and what your body needs to feel its best in your 20s you will have set yourself up for a lifetime of better health and physical outcomes.
2. Don’t Spend ANY Money When a Man is Around
Okay, there are some exceptions to this advice, but if you are out with a man NEVER pull out your wallet to pay for something. Keep all of your money for yourself and your future. If you can get a man to pay for your education, let him pay for it. If there is a man claiming you as his he should be buying you a house, car, clothes, and anything else you want. Your 20s are your youthful prime. Men are growing and gaining confidence from being in your presence. Make sure you’re using the energy you’re giving him to your advantage. Let men invest in you. Being independent and paying all of your bills on your own isn’t a flex.
3. Date with a Plan
If you don’t want to get married skip this tip. Dating is to vet men for marriage. You are single until you are married or at least engaged. Boyfriend and girlfriend are imaginary statuses. Becoming his girlfriend and exclusively seeing him lessens the pressure of the possibility of you getting away. If he has you artificially off the market he can drag his feet about asking you to be his wife. Don’t fall into this trap! You will eventually get frustrated that he hasn’t proposed and will cause all kinds of psychological harm to yourself and him too.
4. Don’t Date Men That Are The Same Age As You
Women mature faster than men do. The sweet spot is to date men who are about 5 to 7 years older than you are. These men are more likely to be on the same wavelength as you emotionally and psychologically. Save yourself (and your kids if you want them) some strife and date slightly older men.
5. Move Intentionally
One of the worst things you could do in your 20s is to go with the flow. Formulate a plan for what you want to accomplish and execute it. I’m not saying you shouldn’t have any fun in your 20s, but you don’t want to wake up at 28 and freak out about not having done anything with your life. Don’t do things like taking on massive amounts of debt, or having a bunch of kids with men who aren’t worthy. You will wake up close to 30 and have a ton of bad decisions to try to counter. It’s best to plan ahead so you will have a less dire situation to try to navigate your way out of. You can always fix it, but make it easier for your future self.
6. Be Careful with your Female Friends
I don’t want you to not have any female friendships at all, but you should take care to make sure the people you are closest to are going to support your highest and best good. Women have to learn the art of integrity and a lot of us don’t. Historically we didn’t have to work as a team or accomplish something as a group so keeping your word and having the next lady’s back is something that we have to learn. Don’t share your secrets or desires with other women until they have proven themselves to be worth it and make sure these ladies are doing the same to you. If they are quick to share personal information they might have loose lips about other things too.
7. Do Not Send or Take ANY Compromising Pictures
It sounds cute to send nudes or drunk texts now, but rest assured they will come back to haunt you. Just say no. Unless that man is your husband he should have no digital proof of what you look like that he can’t see on your social media profiles. No excuses.
8. Don’t Have Babies Without Being Married
It is selfish and cruel to put a child through that and it is selfish and cruel to put a man through that too. Healthy men want to provide for and protect their families. Wait until you’ve found the right guy and know yourself well enough to know you have found the right guy before bringing children into the world after he marries you. Your children will be happier, supported, and safer this way and so will you. Don’t steal the experience of providing for a happy family from that man and don’t steal the experience of a happy and stable childhood from your children.
9. Do Things Now That Others Are Not Willing To Do
There are a lot of things that require you to invest your time energy and money upfront to get the results later. They require you to create new habits and routines that other people are not willing to do. That should be the reason why you do them. If you want to live an extraordinary life you are going to have to do extraordinary things. Do these things for yourself now so if you want or need to monetize it later you can.
Advice for Young Women: FAQs
What should I focus on in my 20s?
Your 20s should be spent focusing on you. Spend time learning about yourself and what you want from life. The worst thing you could do is follow exactly what someone says you should do without considering if it is true to you. Don’t worry about finding the right guy. He’ll find you as you are focused on becoming your full self.
How can I improve my life in my 20s?
The best way to improve your life in your 20s is to network. If no one in your circle can open a door of opportunity for you you need to expand your circle. Megan Markle met Prince Harry through her circle. Who says you can’t do something similar?
What do people regret about their 20s?
I wish I would have learned more about money and how it works in my 20s. Had I known then what I know now, I would have saved and invested a lot more instead of buying frivolous things. I buy frivolous things now but not in the same way that I did when I was younger.
Final Advice for Young Women in their 20s
As a final piece of advice for young women, understand that you can have fun until you are 99. Don’t waste your 20s on just having fun, you have the rest of your life for that. It is much better for your future self to be disciplined and tactful in your 20s so you can live freely later in life. Delayed gratification isn’t fun, but it is a necessary skill to learn to be able to live how you truly want to. Visualize what you want from life and make a plan to manifest it in your reality.
Also, you will be okay if you don’t follow every piece of advice laid out here. I didn’t and I still have a life I am happy with. It would have been easier to accomplish some things faster had I known what I know now. What’s most important is that you consider what your current actions will mean to or do for your future self. Use the energy that you have in your 20s to propel you toward what you really want instead of wasting it on things that won’t matter.
9 Masterful Pieces of Advice for Young Women in their 20s | The Lady Loves Living
